February 18, 2012

The Bathroom Debate

There is a debate going on between my friends and I. Is it normal or abnormal for couples to use the toilet in front of each other? I think some things dont need to be shared. There is no good reason to do your business with an audience.  Sadly, I have yet to find another woman who shares my views on this matter. Our debate started many years ago when I was out to lunch with my girlfriends. We were talking about marriage and how a we have changed since walking down the aisle. On my right was a newly married friend of mine. Out of nowhere, she said, "I love my husband so much, we both have conversations with each other while using the toilet."


My friends were laughing about the look on my face when she said that. Apparently it was the same face one might make when finding something seriously disgusting in the back of the refrigerator. I don't get it.


I told her, "I love my husband so much, we have agreed to not put that visual aid in our memory banks." Why would anyone want that? I can't think of anyone who would look even remotely attractive while doing their business.
There are two reasons I feel this way.

1. When I was 11 years old I accidentally walked in our bathroom and found my grandpa standing there buck naked. Two words...Visual Assault. Big time.


2. Growing up, I can't count the number of times my siblings and I were called to attend family council in the bathroom. My mom sat on the only seat in the room. Do you know how hard it is to be serious, when every couple of minutes you hear certain sounds coming from the person conducting the family meeting?! I don't know about you, but I have those two images in the "Please Erase this from your memories" section of my brain.

Picture if you will, a little baby straining to fill their diaper. Bright red face and all. Mothers instantly know what is about to happen and the same can be said about the family councils of years gone by. Do you want your signifigant other to see you like that? No thank you.

Picture if you will, 5 kids lined up on the bathroom wall. They are getting a lecture from a parent when suddenly they stop talking. Their face turns red. Those kids instantly know what is about to happen.


My question is this: What on earth is so important that you can not wait a few minutes? What life crisis made talking through the bathroom door unacceptable? What topic is so serious, you don't mind hearing random "sound effects"? It's just so wrong! Ugh.
Then again, maybe it's just me. I'm a talk through the door sort of a gal. Maybe I'm the only one of my kind. Either way, I want few moments in the day to be alone. I beg of you, don't come through that bathroom door unless I died in there and my ghost has given you permission.

2 comments:

  1. I'm a banner waving believer in privacy and respect. There is no one on this earth to whom my respect plunges to the level of subjecting them to bladder-bowel noises or smells. I agree with you , June, my friend. I don't enjoy potty talk or potty humor. I certainly don't want a front and center partner potty experience.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I know the feeling. I guess I'm potty shy. Maybe it's the way we were raised, my family was similar with the whole bathroom thing. But ya I'm with you. Some things should be privet.

    Liked your post it was pretty funny =)
    Found you on NaBloPoMo

    ReplyDelete

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Z1jVcmDH43Y#!